So this is one of those articles I don’t want to write. Therefore this is one of those articles I have to write (James Altucher, you bastard). It’s not the shitty stuff that happened to someone else that gets to me (although that does suck). It’s the part where I try be brutally honest about the standards I need to hold myself to as a man. And I’m terrified I might fall short. So here goes …
Long story short
Here we have a story from Sweden (so you already know it involves a young girl getting raped by an immigrant).
Long story short: 12 year old Hanna was lured into isolation and raped. The 17 year old rapist (he must have been an “orphan and widow” right Obama?) was given a hefty sentence of … community service. Hanna, now 13, is being stalked and assaulted by the rapist’s brother, the rapist’s friend, and the rapist’s mother. Nothing is being done to stop this – besides a restraining order.
[And for those of you who want to know under what circumstances a restraining order is actually useful (very narrow circumstances), I suggest reading The Gift of Fear by Gavin De Becker (a whopping $7 on Amazon at the moment).]
Now for the painful part
If you read the news article, you’ll see the part where the girl’s father says this:
“Hanna needs to get her rights back,” Hanna’s father told local newspaper Sundsvalls Tidning (ST). “This boy has a restraining order and still comes and assaults my daughter, but nothing happens.”
Here’s the thing – whose job is it to protect a man’s children?
I’m terrified to ask this question in case, one day, I fall short on this job.
What if I’m too weak to protect my family? What if I’m too weak to do what needs to be done.
I assume you all remember Christopher Nolan’s first Batman movie, Batman Begins. In it, a young Bruce Wayne gets freaked out at the Opera, and asks his dad to take them home (him, his dad, and his mom). Dad obliges, but when they get outside they run into a mugger who then shoots and kills the mom and dad. Bruce Wayne forever feels it is his fault that his parents die.
Later in the film we get this golden nugget of harshness. A slap in the face with a truth-brick. And while you watch it, recall the words of Hanna’s father.
“Your parents’ death was not your fault. It was your father’s fault.”
“Anger does not change the fact that your father failed to act.”
“Training is nothing. The will to act is everything.”
And for those of you blustering and posturing about how you’d do this and that, consider just some potential grey-areas:
Or the case where a rape victim spoke out, and her family died when the rapist burnt the family’s house down.
If you read up on the Telford grooming scandal (or others), you’ll find that a lot of the kidnapped* girls have had their parents and brothers and sisters threatened.
* – Some people might say it isn’t kidnapping if the victim chose to stay. Staying in a long term rape situation because the kidnapper knows where their younger sister etc. lives isn’t what you’d call “choosing to stay”.
I’ll end with a quote:
The question is not “how far”.
The question is:
Do you possess the constitution,
the depth of faith,
to go as far as is needed?
– Boondock Saints